Right now I feel like an open book with a lot of loose ends that the Divine author has yet to tie up. I’m being pulled in a million different directions with cheer, school, career and much more that’s a little bit deeper than the average 18 year old. I have no control over what is going to happen as much as I like to think I do. God’s plan will win no matter what and right now I don’t know what His plan is. I know that wherever He leads me is where I want to be, but my human desires for wealth and success and dream fulfillment are hard to let go of. I feel like I’m really bad at deciphering what is my plan and what is God’s plan. I will follow the Lord and wait for the author of my story to lead me down His storyline.
SELF – PITY IS A SLIMY, BOTTOMLESS PIT, Once you fall in, you tend to go deeper and deeper into the mire. As you slide down those slippery walls, you are well on your way to depression, and the darkness is profound.
Your only hope is to look up and see the Light of My Presence shining down on you. Though the Light looks dim from your perspective, deep in the pit, those rays of hope can reach you at any depth. While you focus on Me in trust, you rise ever so slowly out of the abyss of despair. Finally, you can reach up and grasp My hand. I will pull you out into the Light again. I will gently cleanse you, washing off the clinging mire. I will cover you with My righteousness and walk with you down the path of Life.
Jesus Calling- July 16
I don’t understand 99% of what God does for me. I don’t understand why He does some things and what the out come will be. I don’t understand His plans or His timing. I don’t understand His omnipresence or omniscience. I don’t understand why I must fail sometimes. I don’t understand listening to Him. I don’t understand how He lets some things happen. I don’t understand where He is sometimes. I don’t understand Him.
This would discourage some people and make them quit. Honestly, I have wanted to quit, but I know that quitting is what the Devil wants and success will always and only come through Jesus. He makes all things work together for my good and nothing can change that love He has for me. God sends little messages through people at the exact time I need to hear it sometimes. Like today. It is so sweet to finally know that patience pays off. I cannot walk around in self-pity and thinking that I am not good enough. The world does not define me. Other people, my grades, my talents, my appearance, my success, failures, money, stuff…is nothing. My self worth comes from Him alone. I’m tired of the Devil whispering in my ear that I can’t succeed. With God, good will come out of any situation.
Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hopes in God! I will praise Him again–my Savior and my God! Now I am deeply discouraged, but I will remember you… Psalm 42:5-6